


Drabble 7: That scares me

by tangerinecoffee



Category: Winner (Band)
Genre: Long Drabble, M/M, namsong - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-28
Updated: 2017-05-28
Packaged: 2018-11-05 22:43:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11023122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tangerinecoffee/pseuds/tangerinecoffee
Summary: Canon-compliant. They meet in a shop, their thoughts drowning them again.





	Drabble 7: That scares me

**Author's Note:**

> Another word dump? It's not fluff. I'm sad these days. Cheer me up haha

 

 

 

 

_Seeing someone each day_

_Staying up all night together_

_With late cigarettes between our lips_

 

 

Minho enters the clandestine shop with his palms sweating. It’s raining today, and its cold, but his palms chose to sweat nonetheless. Nervous. He’s still nervous, even after all this time. He shrugs the water off of his leather jacket and steps inside, eyes shifting from corner to corner of the small space. On the end of the furthest counter is Taehyun, hands wrapped around an olive-colored mug, eyes focused on the glass cupboards, seemingly drowning in his own thoughts.

Minho’s been drowned in his own thoughts as well. For the past few days. After the rustle of overflowing time sets and schedules has calmed down, he was left with nothing but his thoughts from yesterday.

 

 

_You are lonely like I am_

_With something that can’t be fulfilled_

_An empty space_

He sits beside him slowly, noticing the little movement Taehyun’s head did when he felt his presence. Minho points at something in the menu when the attendant asks for his order, not really caring what it is as long as they are to be left alone.

Then he let a small sigh escape.

But both of them remained silent.

 

 

_We’ve come too far_

_I don’t think we can go back_

_That scares me_

 

There’s something mesmerizing and holy between the unspoken words clinging in the air between them. Much like hidden stars or lost ships or the first dews in early morning – you can’t really see it but it sparks adoration and sometimes the only thing one can hold onto – hope. Hope is troublesome, it hinders you from knowing when to give up, or if you should give up.

As Minho finally gazed at Taehyun through long lashes – both of them can admit that it’s something brazen yet subtle, akin to secrets exchanged in the darkness and believed with doubtful certainty. Buried in ceremonious words and unchained babbles, traversing through endless links of meaningless promises and sighs.

 _“Meaningless promises,”_ Taehyun repeated inside his head as he tightens his hold on the mug absentmindedly.

He barely thinks of those promises now, barely lets his mind wander back to late night cigarettes and empty spaces.

And of meeting someone each day.

Of staying up all night together.

He glances at Minho through the corner of his eyes.

Maybe it’s what happens when you lost something important – something that maybe, impossible to replace.

He brings the mug close to his lips but doesn’t take a sip. He lets it stay there, pressing on his chin, feeling the warmth oozing through.

He feels calm, and cold, and agitated, all at the same time.

Much like how one feels when you’re lulled to sleep by light rain tapping on your rooftop and wake up the next morning with the rain still frolicking outside, the whole world dim and sad. You stay inside your room, start to think of things you probably shouldn’t be thinking about and slowly, even if you didn’t plan it, let your thoughts eat you whole, let them consume you little by little. At first, you’ll thought it’s caused by mere boredom but the more time you spent on thinking, the more you realize you’re far from being bored.

And then you find yourself crying – droplets at first, like the drizzling rain the night before, and then you’re suddenly trembling – uncontrollable crying and then you’re a mess – like that time when you had your heart broken for the first time (and the first time you realize you didn’t want it to end but it was too late to ask for a second chance). Until you find it hard to breathe and you discern you’re still hurting. Then after a while, you wish you can just simply be numb, but you can still feel that little thorn inside your chest anyway. You want to cry but, you’ve cried way too much so you find yourself still. Sometimes looking outside the window, seeing nothing. Not even your reflection. Sometimes staring at the wall – trying to feel nothing.

Then time passes, and you occupy your thoughts by fiddling with things that never caught your attention before. You’re suddenly interested in doing something (recording songs maybe, starting a band? Who knows?) Because that’s the only way to keep your thinking off of things you shouldn’t be thinking.

“The song’s nice.”

_Did you know it's for you?_

He puts the mug down. “Thanks.”

The busyness of Taehyun’s schedule made him forget – at least that’s what he thought, until he finds himself listening to _his_ old songs looking at _his_ pictures in his phone’s gallery that he originally intended to delete but found impossible to.

Funny how one may think he had moved on, only to be dragged back to scratch when one thought triggers his damn memories.

 

 

_I also want to get rid of it_

_I want to stop now_

_It’s also tiring_

_Hug me oh_

 

 

 


End file.
